Tuesday, May 01, 2007

And I Think to Myself.... What a Wonderful World

Woke up too late to go to class, so I'll just tell you about my amazing weekend. :)

Matt came down on Thursday night. This was problematic because the FUtones were singing in the joint show with Improv!able Cause while I was driving back from the airport. (He flew into Charlotte.) But we still made it back in time for me to see them sing one song, to watch some improv games, and even to sing Toxic at the very end, which was so fun! It wasn't our best performance of the song, but I was still glad to be able to sing at least one with them, and I'd really wanted Matt to hear the song, too. Then he and I came back to the apartment to relax -- by which I mean we watched an episode of Grey's Anatomy, had some margarita, went to Jack in the Box and stuffed ourselves, and watched another episode. This put us at about 4:00 in the morning. Matt's such a trooper -- he'd been up 24 hours at that point! (He had to get up early Thursday morning to do classwork. Poor thing.)

Friday after I went to class, he took me to Olive Garden for lunch, which was really yummy, obviously. Then we'd planned to have most of the afternoon for ourselves, but Will called to say he was almost here from Atlanta and could he maybe come over -- neither of us had seen him in over a year, so of course we said come over right away! We hung out for a bit before going to Monterrey's for dinner, where a single margarita left Will trashed (just kidding... sort of). It was fun. I know Matt was really glad to get the chance to hang out with Will again, even just for the day. And then the two of them came with me when I went over to the music building for the Singers concert so that they could save seats for my family. :) The concert went really well, with the exception of some jerk's cell phone. Always happens. Sheesh. Matt said he was really impressed, and my whole family was blown away. I'm so glad to be in Singers. It's a gift. AND, at the end of the concert the alumni get to come up onstage and sing Battle Hymn of the Republic, and the Vick let them sing Brown Eyes this time, too. Which I guess isn't always the case. So Matt came up and made his way right over to me and held my hand the whole time. It sounds silly, but it was so special. I know it was special for him to be able to come up and sing just because he loved the Singers so much, but I hope it was cool that he got to sing with me, too -- I've missed singing with him. It was just great. :) After the concert we chilled with my family in my apartment for a while, but Dad and Michael had to get on the road and soon after Matt and I went to Junior/Senior (prom). It was... well, it was a dance. Bad music, lots of white people trying to dance, the Electric Slide, and one swing dance. Haha. Matt and I stayed for a little over an hour basically just saying hi to various people and occasionally pretending to dance. :-P It was fun, though. When we came back to E, there were fire trucks and everyone was outside -- so we went to Jack in the Box again! (Surprise!) Before bed, we watched an episode of Friends with Will -- rather, they watched it, and I fell asleep. Hence only one episode before actually going to bed. :)

Saturday morning was crazy -- I had to be at the music building at 10:00 to sing with the Singers again for Spring for Furman. Matt videoed us a little bit, which was cool, and then he and I booked it over to the UC, where the Madrigals were warming up for our performance for Spring for Furman. He and Ike both sang with us, which was lots of fun (I hope for them as well as for us). It went okay... Spring for Furman is always awkward because no one ever really stands and listens for long, so it sort of feels pointless. But there were a few who got to hear who we were, and maybe those will be the few who will look us up when they get here. I was a little irritated with some of the Madrigals... everyone asked if we could sing outside, but then once we started singing, everyone wanted to move inside, and they wouldn't let us because we were supposed to sing outside -- because that's what we'd requested. Oy. And of course I was the one who took the fall, because I'm in charge. Gah. Oh well, we still sang pretty well. And I had fun, mostly. When I wasn't feeling irritated. :-P After we sang, Matt and I chilled with Mom and Doc for awhile -- we went and looked at pictures from foreign study trips, we went over to the chalking festival to see the artwork, and then we went out to On the Border for lunch. Yum yum. If you go, try their Kahlua ice cream pie. It's delicious. :) We went over to Verizon and I got my phone situation taken care of (I hope for good this time) and then Mom and Doc headed out and Matt and I went back to school. His sister and her guy came over and hung out for a bit and then Ike came over for a while, and then Matt and I took a nap before getting ready to go CONTRA DANCING!!! Walter and Megan picked us up at 7:00 and we all headed over to the lodge. I think Matt was really nervous about it, but he ended up being really good and having such a good time that he's started talking about looking up places for us to go when I come to visit him. Hahaha. We stayed the whole time and danced nearly every dance, and he even waltzed with me! (He says we have to practice before we get married... ha!) It was a ton of fun, and I was so glad he enjoyed it too. We're going back when he comes down for the FUtones concert, because there's contra after the concert too. :) He's even trying to get Ike to come, although I'm not sure that will ever happen. :-P We all went to Jack in the Box after the dance, and when Matt and I got back to the apartment, Rach and Ellen were watching the end of some mountain climbing movie, so Matt and I watched that with them before collapsing into bed. Contra is quite a workout!

Sunday morning I was feeling rather nauseous... too much Jack in the Box in too few days, I think. We were supposed to go hiking with Ike -- to think I almost didn't go! I was a total whiner about it, I pouted and complained about not feeling good and Matt was, I'm sure, completely fed up with me. But he convinced me to shower and see how I felt, and then convinced me to come with them, and then took care of me and held my hand and made sure I was okay the whole time. I was shaky at first, but the hike was easy -- less of a hike than just a relatively strenuous walk by a river. And we didn't go very far before stopping to go wading -- which turned into going full-on swimming, thanks to yours truly. That's right, we found a pool deep enough to jump into, and Matt has proof that I did it -- he took a video, the punk. It was so cold it hurt, but it was so much fun! We climbed around the rocks for a long time before finally drying off and heading back down to the car. I'm so glad Matt made me go when I was being silly and pouty. I would not have missed that for anything! And we stopped at some little drugstore that Matt said had amazing milkshakes and I got a coke float. Yum. Then we got back just in time for Madrigals -- Matt came and sang some with us again, and Ike was supposed to but he got confused and showed up after the rehearsal was over and we were already gone! Poor guy. He did manage to make it to FUtones later that evening, though, which was a lot of fun. It was nice to have an audience; in addition to Matt and Ike, Jo's parents and sister were there. Yay! After rehearsal, Matt and Ike and I met Matt's sister Rachel and two of her friends for pizza at Frodo's. We had a good dinner with them. When we came back, we made margaritas and played cards and watched Zoolander until bedtime at midnight... and then we were up at 3:30 in the morning so that we could drive to the Charlotte airport in time for Matt to make his early flight. Yipe. That was a long morning, and then a long day yesterday. Seems like forever ago and it was barely a day!

So basically... that was an awesome weekend. So much fun stuff, and all of it was made infinitely better by having Matt here with me. :) ANDDDDDDDDDD......... I get to see him again this weekend! And again the next weekend! And then again two weeks later!

I love springtime! :-D

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Getting Through

Six more weeks of classes. I just have to get through those and then...

Well, and then there's the summer to get through. I realized today that I feel like I'm just "making it through" life one step at a time, and I don't like feeling that way. I'm not sure how to change it, I just know that I need to. Matt says that I need to just realize that that's sort of how life is for everyone, and the change I need to make is just to accept it and live with it... maybe he's right. Maybe it's just a question of deciding that making it through is equivalent to living life to the fullest.

I don't know, though. Part of me thinks there's more to it than that, and I just haven't found what it is yet. A lot of this probably has to do with my frustration at not having a clue what I want to do with my life.

Whatever it is I'm searching for, I'm not going to find it tonight... here's what's "getting me through" this week.

Sunday - all day Singers tour. Not exactly excited about this, but it's taking up a day. So yeah.
Monday - Pizzle's birthday party. This will be fun. :)
Tuesday - maybe a limoncello reunion with some Italy folks? And definitely coffee with my Rome roomie, which I'm really looking forward to.
Wednesday - two exams. Huzzah. And Madrigals rehearsal, always a good thing.
Thursday - the first round of the Directing class ten-minute plays, and then a Singers performance that night. (missing FUtones rehearsal AGAIN. not cool.)
Friday - more ten-minute plays, but more importantly, THE BEGINNING OF THE FUTONES RETREAT. Oh thank goodness for that. I am in need of a retreat in a huge way.

And then only one more week before Matt comes to visit and lots of fun things happen while he's here. Excellent. :)

I've been getting homesick for Italy recently. I think life was better there because I lived every day just for that day and it was always worth it. I think that's what I want "real life" to be like, too.

Any ideas on how I can make it that way?

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

I Suppose I COULD be Doing Work...

I'm using this as a tool for procrastination, once again... ah well. It happens.

Went up to Baltimore for Easter break. It was... interesting, I guess is a good word. It was great to be with Matt and see him again, obviously... but the conversion attempt by his mother was not such a fantastic part. She means well, I know. But she hurt my feelings and scared me a lot by telling me that she thinks I'm wrong in what I believe -- I know she's not right, that's not why I'm scared. I'm scared that because this is such a big deal to her I will never have a good relationship with her. I'm scared that she will try to ruin what Matt and I have together by telling him that I'm a pagan or something. I don't know. I am a Christian, just not a conservative one... but to her, that's too big of a difference.

Sigh. It was just hard.

And... it's hard to share Matt. It was his birthday on Sunday, AND it was Easter, so the whole weekend involved family and friends pretty much all the time. I expected that, I knew it was coming, and I appreciated why it was the case. But it's still hard to share. I hadn't seen him in 5 weeks... that's almost as long as when I was in Italy! I wanted alone time with him and we didn't get much. I was disappointed and it was hard to be cheerful at times. This stupid long distance thing is really getting to me. I hate it. HATE. The worst thing was that when we did get time together it wasn't quality time. Quality over quantity, okay. But our only extended time together was on Monday afternoon and evening, and most of it was spent with him writing a paper for his class. Obviously I knew he had to, there wasn't anything we could have done to change that. But it still sucked. We didn't get to go out to a movie -- oh, we almost did, and we could have, but he would have been up until 3:00 finishing his paper, if he even was able to finish it by then, and even without a movie we were up until nearly 2:00. We didn't get to do a lot of things that I had hoped we could do -- little things that I was looking forward to for no real reason except that they're OUR things. Playing Canasta. Falling asleep watching a movie. Reading to each other. Reading with each other. Working Sudoku puzzles. See? Silly stuff, I know. But it was important to me.

I'm just sad because I'm tired and I had to leave this morning and I really didn't want to. I was dissatisfied and I didn't like leaving that way. I have to just keep telling myself that he will be here in two weeks and two days... but that seems like forever.

I hate this.

And having all this work to do doesn't help at all. Guess I should try to get some of it done though. Later.

Friday, March 30, 2007

You're Toxic, I'm Slipping Under...

I have only one thing to say.

I got to sing the solo for Toxic for the first time tonight at Relay for Life.

And it was ridiculously amazingly terrifically wonderfully fun.

The rest was fun too... it was just such a rush to have a solo, finally. And to feel like I really did it well. We did Carry On, too, and people cheered after my little part, which is always cool. I'm such a show-off. But you sort of have to be, to be in FUtones. :-P

Anyway... I'm still high off of performing, and I wanted to share. :-)

Night night.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Well, hello

Since my last post, I have:

~turned 20
~visited MD (multiple times, actually)
~been visited in Greenville and Greensboro -- sometimes surprise visits!
~been to Venice, Ravenna, Padua, Florence, Pisa, Siena, Assisi, Spoleto, Sorrento, Naples, Pompei, Rome, and Milan, Italy
~been to Paris and Nice, France
~had the amazing experience of traveling abroad for two weeks with my wonderful boy, Matt
~helped my roomie celebrate her engagement
~helped another roomie get through a break-up
~gotten my first "real" solo in FUtones
~finished my first arrangement for Madrigals
~experienced the Venetian Carnivale
~been to my first cabaret

...and lots of other things that would require more time than I can devote to this thing. :-)

I'm entering a photography contest for this year's foreign study participants. I got three pictures printed today and am hopeful, although there are a lot of people entering, so I won't exactly be surprised if I don't win anything. But I took some damn good pictures. :-) My roomie's fiance (!!!) told me tonight that he thinks I should be a professional photographer. Why is it that no one thinks I should be a banker, or a secretary, or something boring like that... oh, yeah, because I would SUCK at it. Still, though. I can't exactly make oodles of money with photography, especially lacking years of experience/training. Why do I feel like I have to be ready to jump into a ::scary voice:: CAREER as soon as I graduate next year???

But anyway. I digress.

Silly as it is, I'ma put a survey in here, because that's what I do. And because I'm putting off reading Hemingway. Sigh. Why does school have to require so much... work?

Level 1
( ) Smoked A Cigarette
( ) Smoked A Cigar
(x) Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex
(x) Drank Alcohol

SO FAR: 2

Level 2
(x) Are / Been In Love
(x) Been Dumped
( ) Shoplifted
(x) Been In A Fist Fight

SO FAR: 5

Level 4
(x) Had A Crush On An Older Person
(x) Skipped School
(x) Slept With A Co-worker
(x) Seen Someone / Something Die

SO FAR: 9

Level 5
(x) Had A Crush On One Of Your Facebook Friends
(x) Been To Paris
( ) Been To Spain
(x) Been On A Plane
(x) Thrown Up From Drinking

SO FAR: 13

Level 6
( ) Eaten Sushi
( ) Been Snowboarding
( ) Met Someone BECAUSE Of Facebook
( ) Been in a Mosh Pit

SO FAR: 13

Level 7
(x) Been In An Abusive Relationship
(x) Taken Pain Killers
( ) Love/loved Someone Who You Can't Have
(x) Laid On Your Back And Watched Cloud Shapes Go By
(x) Made A Snow Angel

SO FAR: 17

Level 8
(x) Had A Tea Party
(x) Flown A Kite
(x) Built A Sand Castle
( ) Gone mudding (offroading)
(x) Played Dress Up

SO FAR: 21

Level 9
(x) Jumped Into A Pile Of Leaves
(x) Gone Sledding
(x) Cheated While Playing A Game
(x) Been Lonely
(x) Fallen Asleep At Work / School

SO FAR: 26

Level 10
(x) Watched The Sun Set
( ) Felt An Earthquake
( ) Killed A Snake

SO FAR: 27

Level 11
(x) Been Tickled
( ) Been Robbed / Vandalized
(x) Been cheated on
(x) Been Misunderstood

SO FAR: 30

Level 12
(x) Won A Contest
(x) Been Suspended From School
(x) Had Detention
(x) Been In A Car / Motorcycle Accident

SO FAR: 34

Level 13
(x) Had / Have Braces
(x) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) Danced in the moonlight

SO FAR: 37

Level 14
(x) Hated The Way You Look
(x) Witnessed A Crime
(x) Pole Danced
(x) Questioned Your Heart
(x) Been obsessed with post-it-notes

SO FAR: 42

Level 15
(x) Squished Barefoot Through The Mud
(x) Been Lost
( ) Been To The Opposite Side Of The World
(x) Swam In The Ocean
(x) Felt Like You Were Dying

SO FAR: 46

Level 16
(x) Cried Yourself To Sleep
(x) Played Cops And Robbers
(x) Recently Colored With Crayons / Colored Pencils / Markers
(x) Sang Karaoke
(x) Paid For A Meal With Only Coins

SO FAR: 51

Level 17
(x) Done Something You Told Yourself You Wouldn't
(x) Made Prank Phone Calls
(x) Laughed Until Some Kind Of Beverage Came Out Of Your Nose
(x) Kissed In The Rain

SO FAR: 55

Level 18
(x) Written A Letter To Santa Claus
(x) Watched The Sun Set/ sun rise With Someone You Care/Cared About
(x) Blown Bubbles
(x) Made A Bonfire On The Beach

SO FAR: 59

Level 19
(x) Crashed A Party
() Have Traveled More Than 5 Days With A Car Full Of People
() Gone Rollerskating / Blading
(x) Had A Wish Come True
() Been Humped By A Monkey

SO FAR: 61

Level 20
(x) Worn Pearls
() Jumped Off A Bridge
(x) Screamed "Penis" or "Vagina"
() Swam With Dolphins

SO FAR: 63

Level 22
(x) Got Your Tongue Stuck To A Pole/Freezer/ice Cube
() Kissed A Fish
(x) Worn The Opposite Sex's Clothes
(x) Sat On A Roof Top

SO FAR: 66

Level 23
(x) Screamed At The Top Of Your Lungs
() Done / Attempted A One-Handed Cartwheel
(x) Talked On The Phone For More Than 6 Hours
(x) Recently stayed Up for a while talking to someone you care about

SO FAR: 69

Level 24
() Picked And Ate An Apple Right Off The Tree
(x) Climbed A Tree
() Had/Been In A Tree House
(x) Been scared To Watch Scary Movies Alone

SO FAR: 71

Level 25
(x) Believed In Ghosts
(x) Have had More Than 30 Pairs Of Shoes
(x) Gone Streaking
(x) Visited Jail [like, on a tour]

SO FAR: 75

Level 26
(x) Played Chicken
() Been Pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(x) Been Told You're Hot By A Complete Stranger
() Broken A Bone
(x) Been Easily Amused

SO FAR: 78

Level 27
() Caught A Fish Then Ate It Later
(x) Made A Porn Video/got asked to make one
(x) Caught A Butterfly
(x) Laughed So Hard You Cried
(x) Cried So Hard You Laughed

SO FAR: 82

Level 28
(x) Mooned/Flashed Someone
(x) Had Someone Moon/Flash You
(x) Cheated On A Test
(x) Forgotten Someone's Name
(x) French Braided Someones Hair
(x) Gone Skinny Dipping
(x) Been Kicked Out Of Your House
(x) Tried to hurt yourself

SO FAR: 90

Level 29
() Rode A Roller Coaster
(x) Went Scuba-Diving/Snorkeling
(x) Had A Cavity
() Black-Mailed Someone
() Been Black Mailed

SO FAR: 92

Level 31
(x) Been Used
(x) Fell Going Up The Stairs
() Licked A Cat
(x) Bitten Someone
(x) Licked Someone

SO FAR: 96

Level 32
() Been shot at/or at gunpoint
() Had sex in the rain
() Flattened someone’s tires
(x) Rode your car/truck until the gas light came on
(x) Got five pounds or less worth of gas

TOTAL: 98

I'm really not sure what the total means. I don't know the point of it. I think a better way to qualify this would be to say total number of things you wish you hadn't done (mine's 11), and total number of things you haven't done that you want to do (mine's 14). I think that makes sense. I wonder if it's healthy to have that many things I wish I hadn't done... I mean, some of them are just obvious, like watching something die. That sucks and if I didn't wish I hadn't, I'd be worried about me. Um. Anyway. Some things I haven't done are just surprising. Like, why in the world have I never eaten an apple right off the tree? That seems like something you should do. And I never have. And what the heck is wrong with me that not only did my family never have a treehouse -- I have actually never been in one. This just seems wrong. I want to fix it. At the very least, MY family will have a treehouse. And... sigh. I've never been on a roller coaster, nor do I anticipate ever enjoying one. But Matt insists it is a life experience I need to have. :-P So I suppose there's no way out.

Okay, enough procrastination. I'm sure I'll be posting again... someday... hehe.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Mindless Procrastination...

Since I haven't done an online survey in a while. (Clearly this is something that was missing in my life.)

1. In two words, explain what ended your last relationship?
fighting and distance

2. when was the last time you shaved your legs?
this afternoon

3. What were you doing this morning at 8am?
sleeping

4. What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
talking on the phone with Matt

5. Are you any good at math?
yeah, actually

6. Your prom night?
I've had three... four, actually. Ben, Spencer, Ryan, Matt. Wowsers. Ben's was awkward because I didn't know anyone at his high school. Spencer's was awkward because he ditched me once we got to the dance, although I was saved by the other guys we went with... thank God for Brandon Potter. :-P Ryan's was fun but nothing really spectacular, although my dress was freaking awesome. My senior prom with Matt was pretty fantastic because we went out with the gang and just had a blast. We spent dinner deciding what Greek gods and goddesses we all would have been. We were such dorks. But it was fun.

7. Do you have any famous ancestors?
Patrick Henry. Give me liberty or give me death. Explains a lot about my firey personality. ;-)

8. Have you ever taken out a loan to pay for school?
no...

9. Do you know the words to the song on your myspace profile?
don't have a myspace profile, sorry

10. Last thing received in the mail?
stuff from my Mimi

11. How many different beverages have you had today?
1 (root beer)

12. Do you ever leave messages on people's answering machines?
yep, long ones

13. Who did you lose your CONCERT virginity to?
haha, ummm... either the Backstreet Boys or Ricky Martin, sadly enough.

14. Do you draw your name in the sand when you go to the shore?
I draw lots of things in the sand when I go to the BEACH

15. What's the most painful dental procedure you've had?
root canal (it wouldn't have been so bad, except they discovered mid-procedure that they had to do it on two teeth instead of just one, and I didn't have enough novocaine.)

16. What is out your back door?
a balcony overlooking the trail that goes through this side of North Village

17. Any plans for Friday night?
flying up to Baltimore to spend Fall Break/my birthday/our anniversary with the boy :-)

18. Do you like the ocean?
very much

19. Have you ever received one of those big tins of 3 different kinds of popcorn?
yeah... I hate those things

20. Have you ever been to a planetarium?
yep

21. Something you are excited about?
umm... two weeks in Europe with mabo :-)

22. What is your favorite flavor of JELLO?
god, I haven't had jello in forever

23. Are any of your great-grandparents still alive?
no

24. Describe your keychain:
lots of keys, and a whole bunch of little decorative thingys from various family members

25. When was the last time you spoke in front of a large group?
ummm... I guess the last time I introduced the Madrigals to a crowd or something

26. What kind of winter coat do you have?
I have a few... a big black trench, a leather jacket from Florence, and a suede jacket from NY&Co

27. What was the weather like during your high school graduation?
it was a little rainy but it cleared up... there was a rainbow when we left the auditorium afterwards :-)

28. Do you sleep with the door to your room open or closed?
closed

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Rainy day

I love...

-my rainbow striped galoshes
-puddles
-the way every color seems brighter on a rainy day
-the way the lake looks in the rain
-Furman's turduckens
-the color of the leaves on the tree outside my bedroom window
-watching the raindrops play in the puddles
-coming in from the cold to a warm apartment
-hot chocolate
-(almost) being able to talk like a normal person again
-my little brother
-using the lamps in my room instead of the overhead light

yeah, I know... random. But I was walking back to my room after class, in the rain, and I could have been thinking about how I'd just been splashed by a passing car that drove through a puddle and how my bookbag leaks and my books were getting wet and how I didn't get chosen to go on the Singers tour... And on some level, I guess I was thinking about all of that, but the thought that was running through my head was that it was a beautiful day. Which is weird because it's not, it's cold and wet and gross... but I was noticing things that made it seem more lovely. And that gives me hope. It's silly, maybe, that the fact that I thought a rainy day could be beautiful makes me feel more optimistic about life. But that's how I feel.

And it's good. :-)