Monday, May 29, 2006

Final at 9:00 and have I started studying?

(are you kidding?)

Some updates:

Madrigals/FUtones concert-
Huge crowd. Harper Hall was filled with people. Karen was there, as were my parents AND Jack and Michael, which made me happier than I can even begin to explain. The Madrigals went first and we were amazing. Seriously. I had been really nervous, which probably isn't fair to them, but I was anyway, and I was very pleasantly surprised. We sounded beautiful and got loads of compliments. My favorites were from the people who'd come for the FUtones and really loved the Madrigals without expecting to. From musically-oriented people came comments on our style, our sense of dynamics, and especially our entrances. Apparently, our ability to begin the songs together and with grace and strength was excellent. Which is a nice thing to hear, since that's something I've worked on with the group. We ended up with a whopping 45 minutes of music, too, which blew me away. I never expected that. So yeah... that was thoroughly satisfying and I think the whole group was really proud. The one sad part was that Molly couldn't sing with us -- her father was sick and she'd gone home to be with her family. We understood, of course, but it was still sad that she'd missed such a good concert.
So after the Madrigals sang, we took a short break and then the FUtones went on. We probably had about 45 minutes of music as well. Just as satisfying as the Madrigals' performance, though in a different way -- we were all nervous as hell going in because we'd crammed so much into the end of the year. One FUtone actually said she'd been nervous of going after the Madrigals when we did so well. (Which was nice to hear, but she didn't need to be scared. The FUtones could've done pretty poorly and still gotten better crowd responses, I think, just because the music is more fun and more popular.) But we did really well. No one forgot anything (noticeable, anyway) and most of the songs came together quite strongly. It was nice that we didn't end up having to leave anything out. And my two solos went well, even though by the time we sang Seasons of Love at the end I thought my voice was going to give out on me. And then the Madrigals joined the FUtones and the whole big group sang And So It Goes. And Matt got his old solo back, and he sang it well, and I just felt really good about the whole thing. I know it's not what he had hoped for, and it could never have been enough to make the hurt from this year go away, but we accomplished so much with Madrigals this year, and we got the joint concert, and I hope he's proud of what he was able to do with what he had.
My family and Karen were basically blown away by the performances. They were really proud of me after seeing how far the Madrigals have come. It's weird, but I don't really think about it in those terms very often. I know I started the group, but the funny thing about "groups" is that you kind of need everyone for it to go somewhere. So it's hard for me to take credit for the group. It was a neat idea for me to have, I guess. And maybe not everyone would have stuck with it for this long. But... I don't know. I just don't feel like, at this point, it has much to do with me anymore.
But it's still pretty damn cool. :-)

Finals-
I only have two this term. My final for Playwriting was (duh) a play. Which I wrote in (shh, don't tell) about 4 or 5 hours. In the middle of the night. The night before it was due. Sheesh, I'm irresponsible. But I actually ended up being rather proud of it. I liked it a lot. And I really did put a lot into it. It's not performance-worthy yet, but I might go back to it this summer and try to make it that way. Because I really liked writing it.
My Shakespeare final was Friday. I studied for it... on Friday. Well, and sort of on Thursday night because I watched the movies we were supposed to have watched already. So I guess that counts. But the actual studyage was done on Friday, and I think I actually did pretty well on the final. I answered everything and I don't think I said anything wrong, so if I lose points it will only be for leaving stuff out -- which I really don't think I did much. So here's hoping. *crosses fingers*
My English final is tomorrow. I'll start studying after I finish writing in here. And go to Jack in the Box. And pick up a book from the boy's apartment. And probably chat with the boy some. And maybe hang out with Alicia a little bit. So we're talking like.... 3:00? Ish? :-) I really don't care... I mean, I do, because I don't want to fail, but I'm so sick of school and so sick of worrying about class that I have very little motivation to do the studying I need to do. *sigh*

FUtones recording session-
...Didn't happen. Which is frustrating, to a point, but I'm actually kind of relieved. I don't think we were ready to record some of the stuff we were going to try to do. We're going to try and record in the fall, and I'm hoping I can convince next year's FUtones that we need fine-tuning before we do. We only have one song that absolutely needs to be done right away, and that's Walk the Walk, before Adrienne leaves the freaking country. And there are others we CAN record early. But I think there are some that need to be left for later in the term. Not much later, because we want to start new stuff, too. But later enough that we can PRACTICE them. Yeesh.
I imagine this will mostly go unrecognized. There are enough people that want to record ASAP that my opinion will probably not change their minds. Which is sad, because the CD won't be as good. But by the next time we record, hopefully the FUtones will have learned not to half-ass stuff like this.
Yeah, I'm a little disappointed that it didn't work out.
Oh well.

The boy situation-
I'm not looking forward to June 8th. That's when I'm leaving Maryland to head up to Keuka Lake for the summer, and after that date, my time with Matt will be brief and sporadic. At best. But like it or not, it's going to happen. And I may not be okay with that, but I have to live with it.

I have my bad days. I like to think everyone does.

And it's frustrating sometimes when he's so much calmer about the whole thing than I am.

But mostly, I'm actually okay. Because I'm learning to have faith, and I'm finding that I like the concept.


Time to study. Sweet dreams to those of you who will find your way to sleep tonight, and to the rest of you ... well, I'm stealing some of Matt's tea if you want it. :-)

I really don't like humanity sometimes, but I love people.

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